going the distance

The other day, I watched the movie “Going the Distance.” There’s this scene where the two characters are sitting on a bench, people watching and just talking. Drew Barrymore’s character says, “The only way you’re content in life is if you marry your best friend.” This got me thinking. I agree with it. I don’t see how I could marry someone I’m not friends with. A few weeks ago, someone told me that their significant other didn’t have any of the qualities they looked for in a friend. At the time, I kept my mouth shut, because it’s not my life so I can’t really comment. But I just couldn’t imagine being with anyone who I didn’t consider a friend. What kind of life would that be? I’d want someone who would be my partner and be on my side, someone I can count on and look to when I need to be encouraged, challenged, or just need a shoulder. Someone who can make me laugh without even trying. I’d want someone I could sit with for hours just talking, tell my secrets to, and trust. That sounds like a friend to me. It’s hard to even fathom what a relationship would be like if you didn’t consider the other person one of your closest friends.

Actually, now that I think of it, I do know what that type of relationship would be like. I got to that point in one of my past relationships, and it was pretty much the worst thing ever. To have the person you spend most of your time with be someone you can’t even talk to – horrible, I don’t recommend it. I remember going to a lot of movies over that time, because then we weren’t expected to talk to each other so I could pretend like things were fine. Maybe people just have to go through that to realize it’s not how it’s supposed to be.

Or maybe my standards are just too high and that’s why I’m single. I don’t know. When I look at my friends and their relationships, I can see the ones that are genuinely friends with their partners, and I can tell those are the relationships that will last. And that’s what I hope for some day… maybe that’s stupid but I’m just gonna keep on hoping for it.



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