Daily Prompt: Nightmares

Daily Prompt: Describe the last nightmare you remember having. What do you think it meant?

I don’t know that I would necessarily qualify last night’s dreams as nightmares, but they are definitely something I would not like to happen in real life, so I think they can count. I’ve had some pretty intense nightmares lately, but I can’t remember them, and for some reason last night’s dreams are sticking with me, so they will have to do.

Early in the night, I was dreaming that I was in some version of the “Hunger Games.” I was being hunted and kept getting stabbed for some reason. I remember knowing the people who were hunting me, although now I can remember who exactly they were. I just kept running and running, and eventually people would find me and stab me, and then I would start running again. At about 1am I woke up and decided to get up to try to shake the dream. Even as I laid back down, I still had the feelings of being scared and hurt.

I eventually fell back asleep and left that dream for another one. In this one, we were all about to die. Everyone in the U.S., at least. There was a giant flood that was wiping out cities. I was with my boyfriends parents, waiting for him to get back from somewhere. There wasn’t any water where we were, but the giant tidal wave had already taken out the state of Florida. We had the news on and could see that the entire state was covered in water, and it was making its way toward Wisconsin. When my boyfriend got back, he had some print out with him. I looked at that, and could tell that he had just slept with one of my co-workers. Upon further investigation, it was two of my coworkers! And some guy, who I can’t remember. I got mad, and was all, “How could you do that – with her?! Both of them?!” (I apparently was less upset about the guy – although my boyfriend would not sleep with any of those people in real life). He didn’t seem to offer much of an explanation, other than that we were all going to die soon anyway. Just then, on the news, it appeared that our city, along with one in Oklahoma (nowhere near WI) might potentially be safe from the flood. I’m not how those two areas were connected, and if there ever was a big flood or disaster, my town would certainly not be on the “please spare” list. Anyway, we could potentially be safe, but all the water was still coming, and I was mad, so all I wanted to do was leave, but I couldn’t, because everyone was barricaded in their homes. And then I woke up again.

I don’t know what ended up happening, but I’m guessing we all would have died. This giant flood probably wasn’t going to save anyone.

I have no idea what these dreams might mean, but I am open to suggestions. They seem to have elements from several movies I have watched recently, so maybe that’s the only explanation. My dreams are generally really weird, so I’ve given up trying to make sense of them.

Daily Prompt: Far from Normal

Daily Prompt: Many of us think of our lives as boringly normal, while others live the high life. Take a step back, and take a look at your life as an outsider might. Now, tell us at least six unique, exciting, or just plain odd things about yourself.

1. I’m allergic to chicken. It’s weird, I know. But whenever I’m asked to say something “unique” about myself, it’s the first thing that comes to mind.

2. I was done with my Bachelor’s degree by the time I was 20. I stuck around another semester for work, and took fun classes like volleyball and TA’d for a Psych class. I finished my Master’s at 23. I’m a nerd.

3. I may have a slight addiction to tattoos. I’ve recently been told I don’t look like a “tattoo person” and that just makes me want to get more.

4. I used to pass out about once a year when I was younger, starting when I was in like first grade. It was always really embarrassing because most of the time it happened at school. As I got older, it started happening less often, but every once and awhile I still faint for no particular reason. I’m to the point where I can now tell when it’s coming and at least make sure I don’t fall and hurt myself. When I was younger, my mom took me to the doctor, but they could never figure out what was causing it.

5. One of the things I want most in life is to have my own house. I’ve felt this way since I was about 18. All my life changes and delays in “starting my life” really bother me because it just pushes back the time until I’m able to buy a home.

6. I’ve always had a difficult time coming up with “unique” and “exciting” things about myself, because mostly my life is boring. Even though I’m now working with girls to try to increase their self esteem and confidence, it was still hard for me to come up with six of these darn things!

unpredictable life

I’ve had a weird week. The start of last weekend was awesome…I got to visit friends, get a bit tipsy, which is something I haven’t done in a long time, and laugh more than I have in I can’t even remember how long. It was one of those nights where it seemed like everything came together, and all my “people” were in the same place. Everything was hilarious. Everything was fun. No one got cranky. Everyone was in a good mood. It just rocked. It reminded me of all the good things I liked about living there, and gave me some good memories of the ones I miss now that I’m gone.

On the ride home, I got an allergy attack, which then turned into a cold/allergy mixture that sort of knocked me out for the beginning of the week. Waking up at 5:15 sucks much more when you don’t feel good, in case you were wondering. I was already spending the beginning of the week sorting through feelings related to the weekend. No surprise, I’m sort of in the middle of (another) mid-life crisis. Trying to figure out my future yet again.

Then, on Thursday, I got some unpleasant news about someone I care about. Awhile back, he had cancer and went through surgery and treatment, and it seemed like things were looking up. Turns out, they’re not. It’s back, and it’s not looking good. This person is one of those guys that just puts off the image of being invincible to me. He’s one of the toughest guys I know, and it doesn’t seem real that something like this is happening. Even though he’s not one of my best friends or anything, this news has been tough for me to sort through. Maybe it’s because it doesn’t seem like anything bad should ever happen to him, or maybe it’s because of the mid-life crisis stuff, but whatever it is, I’m having a difficult time processing it. 

It’s reminded me, yet again, that life is short. Everything could be gone in an instant, and I need to continually be mindful of that. I’ve been trying to figure out what makes me happy, and where I need to be to make sure that I’m doing what I really want to do with my life. The news I got this week has just amplified that for me – there’s a renewed sense of urgency in figuring out my future. I want to be doing what makes me happy, and I want to be continually surrounded by the people who make me happy, because I never know when something is going to happen to change all of that. 

difference of opinion

The other day, a post showed up on my Facebook news feed from a kid I went to high school with. He said, “I can’t believe how fast the world has been changing With gay rights. I see it in the malls, American idol, The new normal…. Come on people get real. The Bible is a blue print to live your life. Read it.”

Ugh. I instantly got ready to respond…and then I started to second guess myself. I paused because 1) I’m not even friends with this person, 2) I knew I wouldn’t be able to influence his opinion in any way, 3) I didn’t feel like getting preached at. However, as I thought about it more, I did decide to respond, because it drives me nuts when people make comments like this. Also, about three people commented before me with variations of, “WAY TO GO!!!” and “TOTALLY AGREE!!” – and about 8 people “liked it.”

Here was my response – “Doesn’t the bible also talk about loving everyone? And treating others the way you would want to be treated?”

To which he replied, “Yes kris that’s what I’m supose to do and not judge anyone but I know what right and wrong from reading the Bible and I know I’m not judgeing when the gay come out of saying that I’m gay.” Also, “Read Genesis 19.”

Now, looking at the thread again, many more people approved of his statements, but there were a few who disagreed. I decided not to dive into it any further. My internal responses to his argument are going to be the basis for this post. 

Just as the grammar freak in me, I wish I could tell him to also maybe grab a dictionary and learn how to use proper spelling and punctuation. It’s not even totally clear what he is trying to say, and it is annoying to have to try to sift through a statement to figure out the meaning just because the writer can barely form a coherent thought while writing. But that’s besides the point.

He says that he’s “not judging” people for being gay…but isn’t labeling something as “right or wrong” judgment? Whether those definitions of right and wrong come from the Bible or your own personal feelings, wrong = bad, strange, gross, not normal, deserving of punishment and right = good, proper, normal, the way everyone should be. So, say all you want that you aren’t judging people for being gay, but you are. And I don’t think that’s something God would like. Although who knows, maybe when they talk about loving your neighbor as yourself and treating others the way you would want to be treated in the Bible, there is an asterisk that leads down to a footnote that says, “*well, except all those gays.”

From what I remember of growing up going to church, youth group, Bible camp, and confirmation classes, God was the one who created everyone, and everyone was created perfectly. Is this another asterisk moment in the Bible? God made everyone perfectly, except those who happen to be gay? Oh wait – that’s right, people are actively choosing to follow the Devil and lead a life of sin, right? Let me ask you this – how many people do you know that would choose to live a life that meant they would be bullied, discriminated against, looked down on, denied rights of marriage and parenthood, be called disgusting, lose relationships with friends and family, and have to struggle to defend who they are? Probably no one. 

The original poster responded to someone else’s comment, saying that the acceptance of gays is already causing problems – he can see it in the cities and with all the disasters and shootings that have been happening lately. Like God is punishing the U.S. society for being accepting of gays. If God was so upset about it, to the point of punishing someone, wouldn’t he just wipe out all the gay people? Do another flood or something about just make sure everyone makes it onto the Ark except LGBT people and those who support them? Seems like that would be easier than punishing a bunch of “innocent” people.

Another important aspect of the original post that should be addressed is the idea that the world is changing “so fast with gay rights.” Are you kidding me?! How FAST it’s been changing?! It’s 2013 and fewer then 10 states allow same-sex couples to get married. Television shows with same-sex couples are just starting to show up on national networks. Yes, opinions have been changing, and people are becoming more accepting, and as a society, we are more accepting than we used to be. But this has been no where near a fast change. I’ve spent a year of my life doing research on this very topic, and I can assure you, opinions have not changed very drastically, but rather it is a slow process.

When I found the thread again today for this post, more people were commenting about how “God made man and woman to procreate and that if everyone all of a sudden started turning gay and lesbian then the population would go extinct.” Luckily, someone responded to that gem. She said that being gay is not contagious and it’s not something that we’re all going to “catch.” This should be common sense, but apparently not. And it also ignores all of the heterosexual couples that also aren’t having kids. I wonder if the person who made that comment is also worried that we’ll go extinct because more and more people aren’t choosing to have children? I suppose he’s not worried because everyone he knows is having loads of children because they don’t believe in birth control.

It makes me so mad when people use religion to back up all of their ideas. Yes, everyone has a right to believe whatever they want to believe, and back up those opinions however they want. BUT, it doesn’t seem fair to pick and choose pieces of the Bible to support your ideas, and then just ignore other parts that don’t fit. I tend to think it’s better to be more informed and pull from many different sources to form an opinion.

The one question I wanted to ask the Facebook friend who posted this comment – What happens if when you have a child, he/she is gay? What then? Will your opinions change – or will you disown them? Or try to “cure” them? Because, you know what, I’m betting you it won’t work. 

Something to think about.